(This was posted when I was pastor of Wellspring UMC in Wilmington, and reflects the questions we were facing then as a church. I am now the Associate Pastor at Harbor UMC in Wilmington.)

Sometimes I wish God would simply write on the wall so much that I do not understand: when a child is gravely ill, when a life decision looms, when answers seem too far away.

Right now, my church is going through such a time. We are following God's call- we've moved to a new place, and are continuing to strive to be all that God means for and calls us to be. But we wonder sometimes exactly what God wants us to do. For instance, we are small enough that we cannot offer every service and every program other larger churches offer- and I don't think we're called to do that. So when a need arises, we struggle to determine how to respond. Okay- struggle to know what to do. I want to do what God wants us to do- nothing more, nothing less. So what does God want us to do?

Has anyone else out there ever struggled with such questions? I know some have- I stood by when big questions are asked, and I do not have all the answers. I do know who knows the answers, but oftentimes that One is not giving them out.

This is a real practical consideration for me. My family may have to move or not move, based on how we answer these questions. And this congregation will be impacted by our answers.

In the midst of our questions, my prayer life has gotten stronger. My faith has grown. It will get stronger yet, I pray, but i t has led me to trust God more. I know I do not know everything about where we are called and what will happen. But I do know this: we are called to be here. I truly sense in what as happened that God has been guiding our steps. We can see it as we look in the "rearview mirror"- we can look back over so many little things that lined up that it cannot have been coincidence. I don't believe in coincidence anyways.

God Loves me. I trust God. That is all I need to know. Which is good, because many times that is all I know.

It all reminds me of the song by Casting Crowns, "The Voice of Truth".
Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again, "Boy, you'll never win!"
"You'll never win!"

But the Voice of Truth tells me a different story
The Voice of Truth says, "Do not be afraid!"
And the Voice of Truth says, "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of Truth